Well, things aren't looking good. Another one of my girlfriend's fingers has swollen up and we went to the out of hours doctor today who was pretty useless - gave her some Naproxen and told her to make an appointment with her GP. So I'm going to go with her on Tuesday.
I'm feeling pretty crappy right now. All the emotions I went through when I was diagnosed - anger, sadness, frustration. All the 'why's' and 'what if's'. And bless her, she's trying to be all upbeat about it and even comforting me because she can see that I'm worried. I just don't want any of this for her - the medication, the tests, the constant visits to the hospital, the pain, the uncertainty. It breaks my heart to think of someone I care so much about going through this.
Ugh. I just have to try and stay strong for her but it's so hard. Why has this happened? What are the chances?? Why is this illness following me???? I can't escape it, however much I try.
Also, I've been fairly lucky and my arthritis has so far been mild. What are the chances of her being as lucky???
Someone once told me that we can spend a lot of time worrying about things that may never be. If your girlfriend does end up with an inflammatory arthritis, you will both work it out together. I know you don't want to see her go through what you have,but she sounds strong and she will figure it out. Take deep breaths, hold her hand gently, and focus on what is now. Good luck Squirrel. I am hoping you hear good news soon.
ReplyDeleteThanks Cathy. Feeling a bit better today. I was just so angry at the world yesterday. Need to keep calm..
ReplyDeleteOh Squirrel, I hope everything works out, and she just has some random swelling for no serious reason that just goes away. If not, you will work through this. Take care, for you, and her :)
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